I've been crying myself to sleep again. It's really hard not to have my family suporting me. Backing me up. Toby won't stop harrassing me. I wish i could just run home and into my mom's arms and just have her hold me, without judgement. Just as a daughter. Not the "perfect" daughter, just her daughter. I love being here. Joey has finally gotten over his grudge and he's really cool. Although he's making Craig sleep on the couch. I would gladly let Craig have his bed back and sleep on the couch, but i don't think he'd hear of it. Poor thing is so tired, he's already asleep. I find myself not being able to sleep as easily or as well. I wish Craig could sleep with me and we could just cuddle. School starts soon. I'm not sure how everyone is going to take what's happened. It's not like i'll be able to hide it for much longer. Maybe a month longer, if even that. I miss mom. I miss my bed. no i don't...yes i do. I mean every girl needs to have a mother when she is going through a time like this. Craig was upset when i told him yesterday. I have to pretend that i don't miss her. It's so sad when i want her to accept this situation so badly. I'm so afraid i'm going to be such a terrible mother. Craig's excited and i'm trying to be, but i'm so scared. 7 months is hardly enough time to get ready. oh what am i getting myself into?! Time to go tackle the boyfriend, i need my goodnight kiss.